Overcoming Perfectionism: Embracing Imperfection

I want to talk to you about something I’m sure many of us can relate to: perfectionism. I’m going to be real with you here—perfectionism isn’t just about wanting to do a good job or aiming for high standards. It’s much deeper than that. For me, it was about believing that I had to be perfect, all the time, or else I wasn’t good enough. And I know I’m not alone in that.

When I started my counselling training, I was deep in the grip of perfectionism. I thought that, as a counsellor, I had to know everything, have all the answers, and be able to solve any problem a client brought to the table. I believed the idea of “being perfect” was essential to being a good therapist. After all, how could I help others if I couldn’t help myself first, right?

But as I went through my training, something shifted. I learned that I don’t have to know it all. In fact, no one does—not me, not anyone. It was a tough pill to swallow, but it was also incredibly freeing. I realised that part of the reason I wanted to be perfect was to hide my vulnerabilities, to hide the parts of me that weren’t flawless. But as I came to understand more about the therapeutic process, I discovered a key truth that I want to share with you: The client is the expert in the room. Not me.

I may have the training and experience, but you are the one living your life. You have the knowledge of your own emotions, your experiences, and your world. And I’m here to guide and support you in uncovering those things, not to fix everything. That was a huge shift in my thinking, and it allowed me to embrace imperfection—not just in my clients, but in myself too.🙌

Perfectionism and How It Shows Up

Perfectionism can often look like procrastination, overworking, or constantly feeling like you’re not measuring up. It may also show up as an overwhelming fear of making mistakes, or believing that if you’re not perfect, you’re somehow failing. This constant pressure can leave you exhausted, anxious, and feeling stuck.

But here’s the truth I want to share: You don’t have to be perfect. Life is messy, and mistakes are a part of the journey. And as your counsellor, I’m not here to be perfect either. My role is to help you navigate those messes, support you in exploring your thoughts and feelings, and work with you to find what works best for your growth.🌱

If you’re finding yourself trapped by perfectionism, or if you’re ready to break free from the cycle of self-doubt and high expectations, I’d love to work with you. You are the expert in your own life, and together, we can find the tools and insights to help you move forward.

If this resonates with you and you’d like some support from my counselling in Basingstoke, please don’t hesitate to reach out.